"You Want Another Audition?"

Along my trek from the bus stop to my apartment, what should I come across but $20 on the sidewalk. What one does with found money speaks volumes about a person's current situation; both in life, and the immediate situation in which that person is in upon first coming into contact with the discovered currency.

In life: How's your money situation? Do you need this badly? Is $20 a lot for you, or is it simply some bar cash? Is it considered "lowly" of you to stoop and pick-up a damp bill from the sidewalk?

Immediate situation: Is there anyone watching? Does this particular bill look "suspicious" in any way? Are there any bodily-fluid/bodily-solid-coloured streaks upon the visage of The Queen? Are there any homeless/less-fortunate people along the path from the site-of-discovery to your residence?

After asking all of the above questions in my head, I ended-up being $20 richer. Cash-money is untraceable, so it's finders-keepers, losers-shoulda-been-more-carefuls. I can't wait to spend this newly-found bar cash.

I have a meeting Thursday with UBCP (Union of British Columbia Performers) to get an apprenticeship number. I called my agent today, because I still need the contract from ILYBC as proof of my credits, or something. He had it faxed to him, but he's thinking they'll need the original to process everything, so he asked to have the original mailed to him, which he'll have by tomorrow or Wednesday. Great, my only agent interaction of the day.

But as the late Jack Palance said in his portrayal of the rough-and-tumble Curly Washburn "Day ain't over yet."

I got a call at work, of all places.
"You want another audition?"
It was like asking one of those kids on the "World Vision" commercials if they want just 15 cents per day.
"Yes please," said I.
"How about you book this one, God Dammit."
Avec plaisir.
He went on to explain how things in this business are cyclical, which is what I've always been told. It's feast or famine, and I've been starving for a while, so this will be good to break the fast.

This one is for Pilot for a new show called "Caprica" which is a Battlestar Gallactica prequel. Looks like fun, and has a bunch of big words which make me feel all smart and stuff when I talk them with my mouth. It's on Wednesday night with my favourite peeps in North Vancouver, so I'm expecting a hero's welcome.

Hopefully not the 'Nam type of hero's welcome.

Money For Nothing

From Rush to Dire Straits two posts in a row, what can I say?

Since the ILYBC people didn't call to inform me of Friday's cancellation, I get paid the actor's day rate because I was not given 24 hours notice. I have been feeling like all I've been doing lately is waiting by the phone for a call (still no word on NATM2, it's not looking promising), which is what a lot of actors complain about. The obvious solution to this is to "make your own breaks", so I'm looking into doing something, anything performance-related where I call the shots. My thing, my way. I just need the gear, although the MacBook is a good, albeit low-fi start. Something like "Will 2.0". I made that up.

Back to ILYBC and phone-waiting, it is very stressful just waiting for the dang call. I don't know why they couldn't give a few days notice, but hey, that's why they're paying me for doing nothing. Really though, someone in the production office couldn't just say "Hey Murray, can you call this William guy, tell 'im we don't need 'im? Well then PAUSE it then! What? Whaddyah mean Mortal Kombat II can't be paused?" It really can't be.

But I should watch what I say, Fox is reading this after all. I will say that I have bought the book (available at fine bookstores everywhere) that the movie is based-on, and it is quite funny. Larry Doyle also penned the screenplay, so ILYBC fan-boys and -girls have no one to complain to if they "changed too much stuff" from the book for the movie. If the book is any indication, then the movie will be the best and funniest film ever made, hands-down.

Not only is Fox reading this, but upon arriving at the Cactus Club tent yesterday, I was met with some shocking news:

"Hey man, we checked-out your blog!"

Oh no they di'n't. Yeah, they di'd. It's a good thing I was nice after my interview, but in all honesty, all my dealings with this company have been pleasant.

And every work day thereafter for the rest of my life will be better than the last, and the profits, they will make for us the bed of eternal slumber, praise be to Feenie.

I do think it humourous that a restaurant (albeit a major one in the Lower Mainland) did an internet background check, but neither SECURITY company did any check whatsoever; or, if they did, gave no warnings about the NDA's I have signed with both companies in regards to any online publications. You'd even think EA would make sure the people working for them, contracted though we may be, didn't spill-the-beans online in the form of, say a Blog, Podcast, or a "Shoot the monkey, find-out about new features in NHL 09" Flash banner ad.

Heck, the fact that I am writing this very post FROM THEIR FRONT DESK COMPUTER is funny enough to me.

I'll be out of a job by tomorrow.

I find it odd that Fox and Cactus Club both found this-a-here lil' website, but upon Googling myself (my palms have a five o'clock shadow) I come-up with bupkiss. Nothin'. Nadda. I fail to find myself in any combination of my names that I enter. Ah well, if I didn't want people to find this, really, I wouldn't make it. Everyone online should know that they are literally broadcasting to the world, and anything they post can be seen by anyone at any time. No one is safe.

On an unrelated note, Steve, you said you needed to borrow my credit card, and I'm sorry I was too busy to get it to you today, so I'll just type it here: 4556785609871453, Expiry 06/10. Hope that helps, buddy!

Check-out the links to the right, I've just added my horrible Geocities page that I made five years ago. Your eyes have been warned.

Something For Nothing

Really the only things to report since my last post of ten days ago are that I've been shortlisted for Night at the Museum 2 (as of last Monday) and I didn't get called to set (on Friday.)

For all I know that NATM2 short listing may now be an un-listing, and if it is I'm hoping te get a re-listing to audition for some other part (ala 1492's other production known as, say it with me now, I Love You Beth Cooper.)

Other than not auditioning, the past week was filled with a lot of not working and not getting any younger. I went up a mountain on Wednesday. That was fun (and expensive), but at last I was able to look down from the heights that I look up to everyday. At last, I was able to look down upon my world be as tall as I feel (look for pictures to come soon, none of them taken by me.)

Monday I meet at Cactus Club to hash-out a training schedule, get all my training manuals. I find it mighty ironic that I pass the time at my current job by studying for my future job, and I guess that's technically what I was doing when I worked on auditions at work.

That's about all to report for now, so without further ado, here are some random thoughts:

- Happy Pot Day, pot heads! I'm sure glad there's at least one day (or two, if you count July 1st ... and some other random day I can't recall, but it's on lamp posts all over town, so keep an eye out, y'hear?) dedicated to smoking of your beloved "Sweet Leaf". I never understood the appeal of pot, I've tried to distance myself from it as much as possible.

Why? Because I know it would take me under if I started. Really, I don't need anything else in my life to make me lazy and give me cravings for junk food; I can manage that well enough stone sober, thank you very much. Vancouver is a city where people smoke it on the streets and no one bats an eye (unless they get smoke in it, ow) and it's quite popular among the kids my age.

"More people do it than don't," a friend of mine from back home once argued, and it took a lot to stifle the urge to echo the words of my dear, sweet muddah "if more people jumped-off a bridge than didn't, would you?" (I always thought that was the dumbest parental phrase in world until she added "well, what if there was water underneath?" THEN I would do it.)

- This morning I saw one of those planes dragging a banner ad. This particular ad was for a local College. How do you explain that to the registrar's office? There's bound to be a question on some application form that looks like this:

29A. How did you hear about this College? (Please CHECK ALL that apply):
i. ( ) Friend/Family
ii. ( ) Newspaper Ad
iii. ( ) Radio Ad
iv. ( ) Television Ad
v. ( ) Internet pop-up Ad
vi. ( ) Public Transportation Ad
vii. ( ) NASCAR Bumper Ad
viii. ( ) Hockey board Ad
ix. ( ) An airplane dragging a banner Ad

29B. If you checked "xi." what else, if anything was being advertised? (Please CHECK ALL that apply):
i. ( ) BUY WAR BONDS
ii. ( ) THE FORD MODEL T ... NOW IN RED!
iii. ( ) DEWEY DEFEATS TRUMAN
iv. ( ) DRINK COCA-COLA ... NOW 100% COCAINE-FREE!
v. ( ) SEE "JVLIVS CAESAR" PERFORMED AT THE BRAND NEW GLOBE THEATRE

- What's with student film-makers and zombie movies? I swear, every single living film-maker has made one at some point in their career, most of them making them in their early days. I don't dislike the genre, but ... c'mon, enough with the zombies already. What about ... botany? Not enough flicks happening about botany, and I can't see why: No need for crappy make-up or gore effects, and plants are always the first to show-up and the last to leave. Heck, it's like they've never left their mark since they were placed there. They are truly the ideal performers (although some trees come-off as a bit wooden.)



As you can tell, I'm heinously bored, and shall stop myself here before I cause anymore damage to myself and others.

"You're Hired"

Alright, so my good, great buddy Sara suggested I come in to the restaurant where she works and apply for a job. It's a little place called Cactus Club Cafe, and it was one of the first "out here" chains I visited when I moved to Vancouver.

When I lived in Nova Scotia, being part of youth ministry there, we would go out for wings and beer after our youth nights every week. The locations changed over the years, but the idea remained: a social outing with friends to unwind a recap the night/week, and it was always good times. Well, they had the same idea (I think FD brought it over with him) at the parish in Richmond where I sing in the choir. When I first arrived they'd head to the Cactus Club, and I found it quite delightful. To be fair, if there's a place that'll put food in front of me I will likely give it top marks, but Cactus maintained a pretty high level of quality food-wise as long as I've been here.

So with my extremely light work schedule, I made time to visit her yesterday afternoon, and enjoy some of that rockin' CCC chow. I brought my resume, which when combined with my weak-sauce application form made it glaringly obvious that I've had no experience in serving tables, which is what I was gunning for. You can make some serious coin handling hot plates, just ask Sara, my roommates, and any other class members of mine out here who come home with their pocket-seams struggling to contain their tips.

I wasn't guaranteed an interview and there was a management meeting going on when I visited, but I go an interview anyway. I turned-on the William C. Vaughan charm, and was told that I'd be great at that location ... for the kitchen. Not my first choice, but I'd work it if I had to. Then the interviewer recommended I check out the new Cactus Club they're building downtown. I've read about this place, with it's 20' ceilings, authentic art and suspended dining room located in the middle of the business district, this place is literally going to be the hottest restaurant in Vancouver once it's open (June 2nd). The interviewer said to grab a shirt and tie and look alive, because the Regional Manager was going to be on-site to oversee hiring, and he's keeping an eye out for sparkling personalties. Welp, you know what that means.

SHOPPING SPREE!

I headed to the only place I knew with clothes that looked as good as fabric as I do as flesh and bone: Sasso. Again introduced to me by the Richmond contingent, this place specializes in imported European clothing at surprisingly good prices and just moved downtown (corner of Nelson & Granville) in the last few months. I wanted a shirt and tie, and I came out with more than I bargained for, but that didn't surprise me. Let it be known, if you walk inside that store you're almost guaranteed to go from looking at it on the rack to looking at it on your rack (if you're female) in a matter of seconds. And the staff won't let you stop there, just be open to what they give you and know when to say no.

I ended-up saying "no" to a fair bit, but I also said the most expensive "yes" ever at a clothing store, but hey, it's all an investment: for the interview, and for auditions, and it ain't hurtin' the ol' self-esteem neither (fun fact: for those who don't know, that flamboyant blue shirt and vest combo that I sport in my head shot comes from the very store you've just read about.)

I planned on going at around noon today, but I went to the gym first, and then the Princess kept being in another castle, so I didn't get there until the late afternoon, sporting my brand-new shirt, tie, blazer, jeans and sense of confidence.

I rolled up in there and the guys at the front table asked if I was there to audition for "So You Think You Can Dance"

"NO! I'm here to apply for the Cactus Club here, STUPID!" would have been the wrong thing to say, but I enjoyed their playfulness, and told them that I was there to be the best employee in the history of Cactus Club, which may not have been the right thing to say either, so instead I just played-along and said,

"Yeah, should I just get set-up at the front there?"

Then we got down to brass tacks and when they asked I told them that I was there to be a server, BUUUTTT I knew I'd have to start at a lower position first.

"Well, we're hiring Porters right now."

Awesome. I don't really know what a Porter IS (like a bar-back, right, like he helps, uh, "port" stuff around?) but I'd do if it got me to a serving position someday.

So I fill-out another applications form. I hate these because they really make my credentials look awful.

Did you go to University?
Y

How many years did you attend?
1

Did you graduate?
... N

Did you just give-up on that and try acting instead?
Y

List your previous employment experience, with the most current first.
Security Guard, Call Centre Agent, Video Store Clerk.

Are you freaking kidding me?
... N

I slogged through that double-sided nightmare once again, and then the interviewer took a seat in front of me.

"Are you American?"
"No, I'm from Halifax, I've just taken extensive acting training to get rid of may accent."
"Oh, so if you drop that you're saying 'car', 'far', 'bar' (all with hard "r's")?"
"Pretty much, yeah."

We jawed through the typical interview questions, and he said I'd make a good Porter, being a good size, and not being afraid of a little physical labour. I told him I can do pretty much any job I'm trained to do, and I like to joke-around but get down to business when necessary.

"You're hired."

Just like that. Like I said, the place opens June 2nd, so the training will start in the middle of May. I need to get a "Serving it Right" number (legally required to serve alcohol in BC) and I'll meet with them next week to receive the manuals to start to read-up on everything. The other thing they need from me is more people, so you heard it here first, Vancouverites: if you're looking to apply, tell 'em Willie sent'cha.

(Ironic quirk of the day: Securiguard was going to have me patrol the same set of buildings that Cactus will be a part of. Now the guard becomes the guarded. I feel so secure.)

Sailor Hat FTW

I'm digging this new weekend job, it's like the old job, only better in every way: Better hours (although it's hella early in the morning), better location, the computer has speakers, so I can watch DVDs all day (finally finished season 2 of Lost on Saturday), I work by myself, and the twin plasmas in the lobby can be turned-on to the hockey game or any other channel. It's a nice way to make money.

I now work exclusively for Paladin, who took care of the remaining three months with Securiguard somehow. I couldn't work for both (Securiguard's doing, not Paladin's) so I'm sticking with the new company. I'll go on record and say that Securiguard is the most poorly managed company I've ever worked for. Such a pain in the rear cheeks to deal with. I'll be happy to give them back their yellow jacket and vest and never deal with them again.

The Night at the Museum 2 call back went well. I was relieved to walk into a relatively empty waiting room, but that changed quickly. The place was a swarming hive of talent, which always gives me anxiety; even if they're not all competing with me, it's just the crowdedness of it all. Makes me edgy.

BUT, I did "lossen up" and showed some character in the room. I introduced myself to the director, Shawn Levy, and realized how awkward it is to meet people in the audition room. I've always felt awkward doing it, but today I realized why: no contact. They're over there, sitting on the couch, looking to employ you in their motion picture, and you're just kind of standing on the mark going "hey, how's it goin'?" without a hearty handshake, or even an enthusiastic "respect knucks" to seal the deal.

First thing I asked him was,
"Hat or no hat?"
"Yeah, I liked the hat, it helped me picture it."
Sailor hat FTW.
I did the first take, and got some direction from an "actor's director" (according to my agent, who also said he wouldn't have any time to give direction.)
"I liked the read, I just want to see you try it with less 'eager beaver' energy. I just want to see if you can settle into it more."
That may not make sense to most people, but it did to me, and I gave a solid second take. They seemed to like it, and I left feeling pretty good.

I called my agent as per usual, and he said he had some MONEY for me. I keep forgetting about that part. I'll be picking it up tomorrow. It won't be my first professional paycheck, I received that last year doing a Walla* gig that I was set up with through VFS.

*- Walla is essentially giving audio ambiance to scenes. Six actors stand in a recording studio and "voice" the people in the background. You can hear it on movies and TV shows if you listen for it, but it's turned down so low that you can hardly make-out anything specific. It's fun to do though, not a bad was to make $75 for six hours work.

"Show More Character"

Thinking I would walk into a room of various scurvy sea-dogs, it turned-out I was the only guy who thought to dress as a sailor to audition for the role of a sailor, and sadly my hat only lasted one take in the audition room.
"It's the kind of thing the director would want to see," explained the Casting Director when she told me to take it off. It was also a tad disheartening to hear every guy who went in before do close to the same thing I was doing choice-wise. I wish they'd soundproof that door better.

Something that surprised me when watching the first "Night at the Museum" (doing my homework, natch) was the logo for "1492 Productions" who is the only other production company on my resume that isn't from VFS. Yep, Chris Columbus produced the first one, along with Mark Radcliffe and Michael Barnathan (all three are producing "I Love You, Beth Cooper") and all three are producing the sequel. I have my fingers crossed for a possible call back and possible producer-director session. Like, I have all ten fingers crossed here, and it is NOT easy to do that and type at the same time.

I called my agent after the audition, as per usual.
"When did you first shoot on Beth Cooper?"
"Uh, about two weeks ago ... yeah, two weeks ago today, and then I went in again last week."
"Yeah, 'cuz they usually pay you after nine days, so I'm just wondering what's going on here ... I need to call (the Casting Director) and ask her if they're bringing you back."
You mean they may NOT?
It was also odd that he'd ask the CD and not, y'know, someone on the movie itself. So now it's back to waiting by the phone again ... not like I do anything else.

He did go on to tell me that a friend of mine in the agency tested for something in LA yesterday, flying out there at 3:30 am. They didn't go with her, but my agent says "she's getting close." I hope she is, she's working her little fanny off, and deserves everything she's earned.

When I got home (after running to and from the bank to pay for my helpful BC MSP) I had two e-mails from my agent. The first one said that the role of Stavros (the character I read for "Spectacular!") went to someone else in the agency. The second e-mail said this:

"Everyone says your work is good and keep going. One thing is to show
More character and lossen up. Just a suggestion"

I called a buddy and got to watch the first Canucks game of the season with him, which was one of the last games of the season. In fact, it's the game they lost to officially miss the play-offs. Great. So it's screw the Western Conference, and go Pengiuns. Hockey's got me so stressed.

I guess I should lossen up.

Un-Working Man

I've been having a bit of a "vacation" these last few days since I'm not scheduled to work at my new location until Saturday morning. And that's it. That's all they can give me at the new site, which means I'll either have to find some more hours with Securiguard, who has a site lined-up for me to be on-call for or with Paladin, where I have no idea where I would be sent. I don't want to do security anywhere else, and if this site-juggling doesn't work, I can bid Paladin adios; but not Securiguard until June 24, lest I owe them over a grand for my training. It's a huge pain in the rump roast, but if I can just stay "on-call" for three months, and not really have to work, I'm fine with it. However, this vacation couldn't come at a worse time.

The student loan payments have started coming out of my bank account, and I still haven't been payed for (or been told when I'm on set next for) "I Love You, Beth Cooper". On top of that I need to pay for the first three months of my BC Care Card, which arrived just in time.

Let's just say it was important that I visited the walk-in clinic the other day, and let's just say what I was prescribed is helping clear-up the situation. And let's just say I don't like feeling the eyes on me for my sight and stink at the gym.

The Foo Fighters concert Sunday totally ruled, immensely entertaining, but one of these days I SWEAR I will get floor seats for something. Unfortunately there's only upper bowl left for Rush, and I don't know if I want to see Iron Maiden at the Pacific Coliseum (where the Foo's were) because of the bad acoustics.

Monday morning I had my very helpful coaching for my "Spectacular!" audition, which went, wait for it: Spectacularly. Had to do it.

As much as my working situation is worrying me, it's good to have some time off, and to sleep at night. I'm still getting used to this thing you people call "the sun". I'm liking it so far.

I'm going to be watching "Night at the Museum" tonight. Why, you ask? I have an audition for the sequel "Night at the Museum 2: Day at the Museum". I'm playing a sailor in post WWII Times Square, and it looks like a fun little part. The challenge here will be the Brooklyn dialect, so I may get a coaching or I may see what I can do on my own. I figure it's a short part in a comedy, so they may be going for something more "cartoony" here, which I can do.

Time to put my FD impersonation to good use.